1. At parties, do people
A) say "hi" and act friendly towards you, or
B) ignore you like the filth that you are
2. Do people sometimes look at you and then excuse themselves to the
restroom, where they hurl violently?
A) All the time!
B ) Some times.
3. As you walk by, do mothers
A) nod and wave, or
B) cover their children's eyes
4. At the zoo, do your friends
A) buy you ice cream and generally show you a good time, or
B) attempt to report you to the staff as a loose animal
5. Do your friends
A) help you in times of trouble, or
B) stand by and laugh hysterically as the rangers tie you up and throw
you in with the rest of the primates, where you are dismembered and
6. When your parents receive the news of your gruesome death, do they
A)become saddened and mournful, or
B) convulse in such huge fits of laughter that they drop their dentures
into the toilet and drown themselves while attempting to recover them.
7. In your yearbook, do classmates write
A) pleasant, encouraging entries recalling fond memories, or
B) death threats.